Archive for October, 2007
The Independent reported today on a formula promising a “cure” for the common cold. Although really it did no such thing. There’s so much wrong with the article I scarcely know where to begin debunking it. For a start, its written by “Dr Chris Idzikowski, the director of the Edinburgh Sleep Centre” (so I’m guessing he’s not a virologist), and actually deals with insomnia caused by having a cold. So not really a cure in any sense. Let’s have a look at the formula itself:
i4 + (x * t3) + (y * i1) - a1 - t4 + t2 - i3 + (2 * (p+p2)) + L1 = cold cure
Where t2 is having a hot bath (I wonder what the units of “hot bath” are), as this “opens capillaries in the skin, so that the body can shed heat after you get out of the tub”. As far as I can see it, this follows the logic: you need to cool down, so get in a hot bath, your body will divert blood to the skin to try and cool down, and then get out and hope your body doesn’t close the capillaries, thus allowing you to cool down. Why not just have a cold bath?
i1 is for having some alcohol before bed, although it’s hard to know whether Dr Idzikowski mentioned a hot toddy or the journalist did. Either way, you’re not allowed to have more than two units. This caveat isn’t actually described by the formula, so I guess you just have to know. In case you’re wondering what y is (which multiplies i1), it’s “opening a window”. Again, the units aren’t clear, is y the number of windows opened, or how far you open them? And in any case, what does it have to do with alcohol? Can you drink more than the allocated two units if you close some windows? In fact, opening zero windows will negate the effect of any alcohol, so drink away!
Throw in TV viewing (a1 - again no units (number of hours of TV? Minutes? Number of TVs??)), bedsocks (t4 and I’m not joking), and Beechams Flu Plus (i4). Then work them all out to see… er… what? I don’t know. A value? A percentage? Nowhere does the article tell us what the fuck this is even supposed to work out. Add to that i3, p, and p2 aren’t even described in the article. Who knows what they are? I don’t. Do you? Maybe journalist Paul Rodgers knows. I don’t think he does. I don’t think he even cares. All that matters is this: a Brainy Scientist has come up with a Formula that Looks Complicated and Solves A Problem. You, pleb reader, are not required to know the details, and are not invited to. By the way, did we mention he has a book out?
More tedious viral marketing disguised as science.
October 30th, 2007
October 28th, 2007
I know many of you out there are thinking: “I wish someone out there would make a face cream that I could feel confident spending £350 on”. Thankfully cosmetics company Chantecaille have come to the rescue. Cleverly realising that rich people have far more money than sense, they have produced Chantecaille Nano Gold Energising Cream, which boasts not just gold, but silk fibres coated in nano gold! Helen Brown at the Times Online is convinced, stating:
“The wide-ranging uses of gold are such that particles are now being considered by scientists as a possible way to detect and treat cancer. Which makes it easier to believe that, in face creams, it works a treat to soothe stressed skin.”
Hmm. You mind running that logic by me again? I heard acne is something to do with hormones, but that didn’t convince me to rub bull semen on my face. This is prime cargo cult science - a hazy idea of some miraculous substance, stripped of all qualifying caveats and details, and pumped into a standard face cream. Science is golden, people; this cream is just bunk.
October 28th, 2007
There are two types of things that kill kids these days: real danger, and fear of danger. This is about how when you protect kids from the first, they’ll fall victim to the second.
One of the cruellest ironies of modern life is that, as we eliminate the truly fearful from our society (hunger, cholera, etc.), we become increasingly fearful of what’s left - even when these have little or no evidence of harm (EMF, vaccines, E numbers). In fact, it’s especially the fact that these have no evidence of harm that makes for such rich irony - as if humans have some inbuilt quotient of fear that needs to be spent on something, anything.
Let’s look at vaccines in particular. There are two main bugaboos in particular, and I’ll look at one “solution”. Firstly, some vaccines have used thimerosal, a mercury containing preservative. They say it causes autism and point to the House of Representatives report calling for its use to be discontinued. Meanwhile, the CDC says:
There is no convincing scientific evidence of harm caused by the low doses of thimerosal in vaccines, except for minor reactions like redness and swelling at the injection site. However, in July 1999, the Public Health Service agencies, the American Academy of Pediatrics, and vaccine manufacturers agreed that thimerosal should be reduced or eliminated in vaccines as a precautionary measure.
That would be “precautionary” as in, “it’ll win some soccer mom votes”. Meanwhile, on this side of the Atlantic, a certain doctor whipped the nation into hysteria by insisting a loose, flawed correlation between autism and MMR jabs counted as conclusive evidence that vaccinating your child was the equivalent of slamming its head in a car door. The result has been a steep drop in not just combined but all vaccinations in Britain. Measles outbreak, here we come.
Perversely, when the public decides to reject a very decent treatment against a very real danger, they also demand a different treatment, and so usually end up with a very dubious one. Here’s my pick of the bunch: HealthyChild.com. Before they even get onto the subject of alternatives to childhood vaccinations, they posit this interesting question:
What would induce me to vaccinate my children? The answer: only a completely new technology that proved to be both safe and effective.
Hmm. Safe and effective? Where will we find such a technology? Anyway, in the absence of a proven, safe, effective (and arguably, new) treatment, what does Randall Neustaedter - a bona fide 9 canard quack - suggest in its place?
Promote the strength of your child’s immune system instead, and avoid things that can weaken it.
This translates as “eat like a hippy”, which means no saturated fats, added sugar or antibiotics(?), plenty of organic food (”your child will not be eating pesticides that injure the liver” - o rly?), homeopathy, acupuncture, bovine colostrum, and knocking back vitamins. Let’s leave aside the complete inanity of abandoning a safe and effective treatment in favour of outdated mysticism and magic water, and focus on the nutrition.
In the Third World, with its associated poor nutrition (and healthcare), mortality rates from measles are around 10%. That means if you’ve got three kids, and they all become infected (pretty likely with measles’ 90% infection rate), there’s a 25% chance one of them will die. Man, I bet those Third Worlders wish they had themselves some vaccines.
In good old Blighty, fatalities from measles are much rarer, clocking in at around 1 in a 1,000 or 0.1%. Of course, our superior nutrition is down to an abundance of cheap carbohydrates - the very same sugar and fat that you’ve cut out of your child’s diet. Congratulations, you’re doubly stupid.
Even with adequate nutrition, your child faces a 1 in 1,000 chance of dying from measles. That sounds pretty good until you realise that thanks largely to Dr Wakefield, there were 449 cases of measles last year, compared with 77 the previous year. So 2008 should definitely see some kids die from a completely preventable disease. In fact, it’s already begun. Congratulations Dr Wakefield, congratulations Randall Neustaedter. In some grim irony, I expect that once the soccer moms see the empty seats appearing in the back seats of SUVs, they might think again about which is the greatest danger.
Truly, there is nothing to fear, but fear itself.
October 23rd, 2007
The Daily Mail loves to talk about food. It also loves to scare the hell out of its readers by connecting certain foods with cancer. But that’s OK, because the Daily Mail also tells us which foods will protect us from cancer. In fact, it seems almost any food can be somehow traced to an increased or decreased risk of cancer. Don’t believe me? For those of you with less time on your hands than me, here’s a crash course in what to eat.
Foods that will save you!
Fruit, veg, soy, vegetable curry, cabbage, pulses, oily fish, pumpkins and other yellow food, grapefruit, chilli peppers, blueberries, purple and brightly coloured food, broccoli, tea, skimmed milk, cottage cheese, yoghurt, pulses, red meat, wholegrains, onions, curry, fibre, dairy, oily fish, pulses, brussel sprouts, soy, mango, papaya, red peppers, carrots, sweet potatoes, butternut squash and oranges, tomatoes, watermelon, pink grapefruit, wholewheat, linseeds, rye, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, curry, milk, dairy, meat, tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, citrus juice, and pizza.
Avoid at all costs!
Ryvita, pringles, Rice Krispies, pork, beef, lamb , salt, milk, tea, coffee, alcohol, cake, biscuits, pastries, peanuts, grains, fried food, chips, crisps, biscuits, bread, salt, red meat, grains, peanuts, alcohol, coloured sweets, sausages, burgers, baby food, potatoes, crisps, crispbreads, breakfast cereals, red meat, BBQ, salt, chips (again), fibre, and spicy food.
You might have noticed that a few of these foods appear in both lists. Umm… I don’t have an explanation for that. If this was a Venn diagram, these foods would be in the overlap. Perhaps you can make a Venn diagram for me.
October 21st, 2007
Kellogg’s, that sterling bastion of breakfast and strong opponent of masturbation, has been rapped by the ASA over its claims made in adverts for Special K Sustain. The voiceover stated that the cereal contains “extra protein” when in fact it had less. The confusion came about because Kellogg’s had compared a 30g serving of regular Special K with a 40g serving of Sustain. Right…. So it’s sort of truthful, in a dishonest kind of way. The Advertising Standards Agency have told Kellogg’s not to broadcast the advert again.
October 17th, 2007
The fallout from our internationally-acclaimed booklet on evidence hunting, There Goes the Science Bit, had left us with some interesting flotsam knocking about the office. Someone had kindly donated to us £20 worth of Champneys Detox Patches. These claim to:
draw out your body’s harmful toxins overnight. Repeat the treatment every night and by morning you will be able to see the results of the detox.
O RLY? I suspect that these pads contain nothing more than wood vinegar, which will turn an ugly brown colour when wet (HYPOTHESIS). This calls for a little experiment!
METHOD: Here’s Alice. She busted homeopaths prescribing water-remedies for malaria prevention. She’s awesome.
Alice will be our CONTROL. Here’s Ellen. She’ll be our TREATMENT GROUP. Is she look toxic? We’ll soon find out.
Ellen decided to use the patch on her foot. I expect that’s where all the heavy metals end up (arf! arf!).
Alice applies some lovely Thames tap water to the control pad. It’s the cleanest water in the world, you know.
This is what the pad looked like to begin with.
After a few minutes, the control patch was turning a funny colour. OMG toxins!
I decided to give the detox pad a little poke. Aware that my finger might contaminate the pad, I placed it back inside its protective cover. Here is my prodding action, so that you may replicate it.
That looks nasty! Let’s see what we ended up with.
Now, the important bit. How has our control fared against the treatment group? It’s time for Ellen to remove her detox pad (approx 6 1/2 hours early, according to instructions on the box).
Wow! Ellen = nasty. Her pad has changed colour too! More or less the same amount as our control pad. What can we learn from this?
CONCLUSION - One or more of the following may be true:
- Toxins make the pad turn brown.
- Water makes the pad turn brown.
- London tap water is full of toxins.
- Ellen is full of toxins (but slightly less so now)
- Ellen is full of London tap water.
We’re off to carry out more research. All we can recommend is not spending £20 on detox patches until we have definitive proof!
NEW! See what happens inside a detox pad: Champneys Detox Pad Dissection!
NEW! More slamming science in:
Champneys Detox Pads - the clinical trial
NEW! Even more science punkery in:
Scientific Study on Detox Pads
October 16th, 2007
Some of you may remember that last year Sense About Science took a break from fuelling internet gossip to strike out at errant homeopaths. Armed with a secret camera and an intrepid intern, they filmed therapists registered with the Society of Homeopaths prescribing remedies to prevent malaria, in direct contravention of the Society’s charter. This explicitly prohibits:
…making claims (whether explicit or implied; orally or in writing) implying cure of any named disease.
Homeopathy seems harmless enough when curing Home Counties housewives of miscellaneous aches and pains, but claiming it can do what billions of dollars of earnest medical research has so far failed at is a dangerous stance. However, this is not an article on whether homeopathy works.
Andy Lewis, blogging from his fortified compound at Quackometer.net, penned “The Gentle Art of Homeopathic Killing”, an article fiercely critical of the Society of Homeopaths because of their apparent reluctance to take action against errant members (who, remember, were filmed breaking the Society’s rules). As Lewis saw it, if the Society were a regulatory body - as they claim to be - members who flout their rules should be disciplined or dismissed. If this didn’t happen, the Society only existed to add a veneer of authenticity to an already murky profession.
The Society of Homeopath’s response was to threaten Lewis’s hosting company, Netcetera, with legal action unless the offending material was taken down. After some discussion, Lewis reluctantly removed the entry (in order to keep the rest of his site online) until this unfortunate business could be resolved. At no time has the Society contacted Lewis directly to explain what about his post was defamatory, or to respond to his criticisms.
As any fool knows, trying to censor material on the internet is an exercise doomed to fail. At the time of writing, one week after Lewis removed his criticisms, the article has been reposted verbatim on over a dozen sites, and the number continues to grow. This is known as the Streisand Effect - efforts to censor material inevitably result in it becoming more widespread. You may remember a similar attempt by Ann Walker to silence David Colquhoun, which resulted in the Festival of Ann Walker, as bloggers the world over took turns to dissect her claims.
However, the most important aspect of this case is that it does not centre on whether homeopathy works. This is not about dubious alternative treatments. It’s very telling that while the Society of Homeopaths tolerates endless attacks on the science of homeopathy, it panics when the Society’s ability to act as a regulatory body is brought into question. This is because the Society knows that even if homeopathy is debunked as nonsense (which it has been), people will still want it - the offer of cheap, personalised medicine is too seductive to reject. Challenging its credibility as an organisation is far more dangerous, because the Society draws its strength not from a belief in homeopathy, but from a trust in the Society. A trust that looks to be irrevocably damaged by their heavy-handed tactics toward Andy Lewis.
October 14th, 2007
Finally, after months of sweat and tears and secret taping, lawyers, career shifts, late nights, a cast of thousands (well, dozens) and lots of writing, the mega-project is finished. Behold, There Goes the Science Bit…
From food that doesn’t contain chemicals to a spray that shields against EMF, young scientists have been contacting organisations – manufacturers, distributors, retailers – to ask for more evidence for such claims. This is their dossier of extracts from their experiences.
The Voice of Young Science network hope their work will encourage more people from all walks of life to question claims and ask for evidence.
See, it’s like a big version of the SciencePunk letters, only with loads of Science Punks, plus it’s been through the lawyers so I definitely won’t get sued! You can download a .pdf version of the document here. The Guardian have already written about it here. New Scientist and Sky News will be covering it, plus some other cats.
It’s also different because this is the first time I got paid to take on bad science. In case you hadn’t read my bio, I’m now in the pay of Sense About Science - media agitators / science punks / industry stooges / pro-GM lobbyists / anti-environmentalists / left-wing rightists / Commie bastards depending on who you ask. We all wear red berets in the office and run a collectivist approach to stationery.
Anyway, back to the point. It’s done. I’m happy.
October 10th, 2007
If more kids knew about research like this, there wouldn’t be a shortfall in science graduates.
A study shortly to be published in the journal Evolution and Human Behaviour found that lap dancers in their most fertile phase of the menstrual cycle earned much more than dancers in the least fertile phase. In contrast, dancers who took the contraceptive pill, which ‘flattens’ the hormone cycle, earned much the same throughout the month.
Read the full story on Mind Hacks.
October 9th, 2007
There’s very few people in the country who can’t be aware of the ongoing drama surrounding the disappearance of Madeleine McCann, the UK child who vanished from a hotel room while on holiday in Portugal. She has been missing for over five months now, and any hope of finding her alive is almost gone.
One of the saddest aspects of situations such as these is the fertile ground they lay for any number of crackpots, charlatans and frauds, and McCann’s disappearance is sadly not exempt. Today’s Observer reports that retired South African police superintendent Danie Krugel located McCann’s remains as buried under the beach at Praia da Luz, the resort where her family had been staying.
How did Krugel discover this?
Based on a combination of Madeleine’s DNA sample and GPS satellite technology, Krugel’s findings were taken so seriously by Portuguese detectives that officers twice searched the beach.
This would be Krugel’s “Matter Orientation System (MOS)”, a mysterious device that uses quantum technology, the same stuff used to power PWB’s £500 crocodile clip, John Hutchison’s fake anti-gravity machine, and a possible method of turning yourself into a horse. Other than that , little is known about the MOS because Krugel won’t allow it to be examined by anyone. Inexplicably, this is reported by the Observer as a “forensic” test. Worse still, the Portuguese authorities apparently acted upon this “information”.
Nothing upsets us more than the thought of an abducted child, but perhaps some things should. Psychics, clairvoyants, remote viewers, dowsers, and charlatans such as Krugel seem mostly harmless when dishing out “readings” on premium rate phone lines. Assuming the role of serious detective, however, makes them despicable vultures of grief, preying on the most desperate sections of society. Shame on Krugel and his ilk.
October 7th, 2007
During the Second World War, the British moved production of war machine parts to awesomely-named “shadow factories“, to protect them from enemy bombers. The Americans, being American, simply decided to cover theirs in camouflage. Lots of camouflage. The result is surprisingly effective:
Via ThinkorThwim.
October 6th, 2007
Somewhat grossly exaggerated as a “science journalist”, I appeared opposite Kylie Morris on More4 news this evening, struggling in vain to defend the Ig Nobel prizes. You can watch my performance here (I haven’t plucked up the courage yet). In my defence I was drafted in at the last minute, blah blah blah. A career as a vacuous talking head beckons.
Also, the Green Room was filled with coke and hookers, so it wasn’t all bad.
** Incidentally, many people have pointed out that the space programme wasn’t responsible for the invention of Teflon and non-stick frying pans. My bad. I’ll have to debunk myself on these pages next week.
October 6th, 2007
Now over to the wonderfully named Cockeyed Science Club, where Rob has constructed an interesting experiment in novel forms of speed reduction. Living in a leafy suburb that suffers at the hands of speeding motorists, Rob decided to see what objects, left by the road, would reduce traffic speed most effectively. Mr Potato Head? A pink tricycle? Or something else? Armed with a $20 Hot Wheels radar gun (yes, they make them and yes, they work), Rob sets out on an intrepid adventure of science, danger, children and maths. Cockeyed Science Club, we salute you, our latest Science Punk!
October 5th, 2007
Recently the Daily Mail sadly broke a commendable run in good science reporting by giving generous column space to Christopher Eccles and his “12inch miracle tube”. Produced from a makeshift lab on an industrial estate in Lancing, the device is equivalent to an immersion heater except that it manages to put out more energy than it puts in. Sharp-minded readers will have already realised that this makes it a perpetual motion device - the bane of sensible physicists everywhere. So how does it work?
So, roughly speaking, a mysterious reaction happens in the mysterious substance containing potash, which heats the water. The article claims this mixture is simply a catalyst to release energy from the potash. Sure, why not, they use potash in explosives, so it’s got to have some good heat energy locked up in it. Of course, burning potash is probably a lot more expensive than heating water by burning natural gas. Which is probably why the following inexplicable statement appears:
Researchers believe it taps into a previously unrecognised source of energy, stored at a sub-atomic level within the hydrogen atoms in water.
Eh? According to the diagram, the reaction doesn’t take place in the water, so the magic substance never even comes into contact with the water. It must be a revolutionary device indeed to unlock this “sub-atomic energy” in water just by heating it. And this is the crux - even if this device does work as stated, it’s not putting out more energy than is going in. The water leaves the device changed, with the sub-atomic energy converted into heat. This might not matter if you’re showering in it, but this is supposed to be a replacement to the standard immersion heater in your central heating system. As everyone knows, the water in radiators goes round and round, leaving the tank hot and returning to it cold. So what happens when the water in this system returns to the 12inch miracle tube? The sub-atomic energy has been released already! No second miracle heating for you.
So there you have it, a device that works via an unknown system, breaks the laws of physics, manages to free undiscovered sub-atomic energy in water simply by heating it, and can do this again and again. You were doing so well, Daily Mail.
October 4th, 2007
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