Daily Mail Guide to Food
October 21st, 2007
The Daily Mail loves to talk about food. It also loves to scare the hell out of its readers by connecting certain foods with cancer. But that’s OK, because the Daily Mail also tells us which foods will protect us from cancer. In fact, it seems almost any food can be somehow traced to an increased or decreased risk of cancer. Don’t believe me? For those of you with less time on your hands than me, here’s a crash course in what to eat.
Foods that will save you!
Fruit, veg, soy, vegetable curry, cabbage, pulses, oily fish, pumpkins and other yellow food, grapefruit, chilli peppers, blueberries, purple and brightly coloured food, broccoli, tea, skimmed milk, cottage cheese, yoghurt, pulses, red meat, wholegrains, onions, curry, fibre, dairy, oily fish, pulses, brussel sprouts, soy, mango, papaya, red peppers, carrots, sweet potatoes, butternut squash and oranges, tomatoes, watermelon, pink grapefruit, wholewheat, linseeds, rye, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, curry, milk, dairy, meat, tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, citrus juice, and pizza.
Avoid at all costs!
Ryvita, pringles, Rice Krispies, pork, beef, lamb , salt, milk, tea, coffee, alcohol, cake, biscuits, pastries, peanuts, grains, fried food, chips, crisps, biscuits, bread, salt, red meat, grains, peanuts, alcohol, coloured sweets, sausages, burgers, baby food, potatoes, crisps, crispbreads, breakfast cereals, red meat, BBQ, salt, chips (again), fibre, and spicy food.
You might have noticed that a few of these foods appear in both lists. Umm… I don’t have an explanation for that. If this was a Venn diagram, these foods would be in the overlap. Perhaps you can make a Venn diagram for me.
Entry Filed under: General
|
|
|
|
4 Comments Add your own
1. Jon | October 22nd, 2007 at 2:31 am
Respect. That is one hell of a lot of daily mail reading there. Do you get desensitised eventually?
2. Stu | November 1st, 2007 at 3:22 pm
I assume Ryvita can kill by boring it’s victims to death?
3. Frank the SciencePunk | November 1st, 2007 at 4:05 pm
Yes, it causes a very uninteresting form of cancer that medical staff are completely indifferent to, ensuring your death will be a drawn out, tedious affair that nobody cares about.
4. Gypsum Fantastic | November 2nd, 2007 at 9:28 pm
Amusingly, the DM’s headline the day this week’s don’t-eat-bacon-it-will-give-you-cancer health scare story broke was “WELL WHAT _ARE_ WE SUPPOSED TO EAT?”.
To quote Stewart Lee, “Lazy Journalist Scum!”
Leave a Comment
Some HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
Trackback this post | Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed